Bailey starts nursery

bailey

Bailey has just started at nursery, and I am finding the process quite hard. She is so ready in many ways; she is eager to learn, has always been social, and loves spending time with other children. There is no question that I really need the time. Trying to make lovely things to sell, whilst getting Margot all ready, looking after Bailey full time, and trying to sell and buy a house is a lot! The five hours I will eventually get for the two mornings that she will go a week, will get well and truly used.

She spent most of her first morning skipping about, singing “me going to nursery” and saying “me excited.” Whereas I sat on the side of the bath and had a secret cry.

When I said to Bailey “Really going to miss you today” she calmly replied “Don’t worry mummy, I will come home with you.

I felt really caught off guard by my feelings though. Partly because there has been so much going on, that Bailey starting at nursery has snuck up on me a bit. Instead of just focusing on getting through the morning, I started to wonder why I was feeling so sad? This is something I return to again and again, but Bailey starting at nursery is just one more marker that she is growing up. Every time she has a significant moment of development, it reminds me she is no longer a baby.

If I new there was another baby coming around the corner, I think I would be able to get more happiness from these milestones. As it stands though, they just act as a reminder that this might be the last time I do this.

When we got to nursery she had lots of fun… until she realised I was going to leave. Then there were tears. It does not feel good to leave your child crying, especially when you know you could stop it, just by going back and giving them a cuddle.

Week two and she is aware what is happening, and has started to say the very sentence that makes my stomach sink a little for her, “me not want to go to nursery today”. She will also, in the next breath sing, “nursery, me going to nursery”. I feel a bit confused, and it makes me question what is the best thing for Bailey.

When I ask her about her morning at nursery, she seems to have enjoyed her time, but I also get a chorus of “me don’t like you being far away mummy”. Today when we left however, she had changed her tune. Instead of focusing on telling me she’d missed me, she remembered all the fun things she hadn’t done; “I didn’t play in the sandpit mummy, I didn’t do any painting mummy”, so perhaps we are making progress.

The staff at the nursery have been really supportive, and we are having a home visit soon. I think this is a really good idea and am hopeful this will make Bailey feel more comfortable with the nursery workers. We will just have to wait and see.

I know it is still very early days, and I need to give her time to adjust. How both Bailey and I feel about nursery seems to be evolving quite quickly. I just hope she settles soon, and it becomes a happy place. Wish us luck, and good luck to all other mummies & daddies everywhere doing the same thing.

 

 

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  • harriet

    Hi there – I have never commented on your blog before but love your stuff and live close by. I too only have one child (a girl too) and it is hard for us to know that these milestones are first and last for us. Letting your child grow up when there are no more coming up behind them is bittersweet. It does get easier though. And only girls have such a close bond with their mums so it is worth getting it right – ie putting on that brave face and letting her go with a smile. She will always come back to you if you do that. Mine has and she is much older. Hx

    • geoffreyandgrace

      Hello Harriet

      Lovely to hear your thoughts, and thank you 🙂 It helps knowing that somebody else has had similar experiences. I don’t know why it does help… but it does. Thank you X

  • I feel for you, it is so hard, a couple of weeks ago, they had to virtually pull Dottie off of me, it was heartbreaking, and she cried for an hour, but this week, she smiled both days and didn’t even flinch when I left. I think generally they grow to love it, it’s great for them socially, and they do things we don’t do with them at home. I think as a rule, it’s worse for us than the little ones. You will get used to it too I promise, and it’s important to have time for yourself to concentrate on your exciting projects xx

    • geoffreyandgrace

      Thanks Emma. Hope Bailey takes to it as quickly as Dottie seems to have. And you are definitely right… it is important for me to have the time. X

  • Clare

    Beautifully written blog and just captured exactly what I’m feeling with Max. I must say I disagree with the above. It’s not just girls that have a special bond like that. Max and I share a very special bond. He is settling in at nursery (2 mornings a week too) but continues to tell me ” I miss my mother ” which breaks my heart. It’s the right time. It’s a fabulous nursery, and he’s ready for this. He will be fine and I will, in time, love my time off. But I will never ever get over the pit in my tummy that is the realisation that my baby boy is growing up…

    • geoffreyandgrace

      Thank you Clare and it is hard, but I think we will get more familiar with the process of them growing up. Lots of love xx