Things look a little different around here. I don’t just mean the way that the blog looks (although that is different too). The new design is not 100% finished yet, and the blog will probably sit in this ‘nearly done state’ for a little while.
Originally I started the Monthly Voice to let you know where I have been finding inspiration each month, and to share things that have captured my heart. However I spent most of April trying to slow down and reconnect to my heart and find any form of inspiration at all. Occasionally inspiration would strike, but it would quickly dissipate into a fog of tiredness.
Oddly, even though really good things have been happening recently, it was one of the most challenging months I have had for a while. I’m experiencing this disconcerting mix of feeling stuck, yet also feeling like I am right on the verge of something. I have only just figured out that fear is playing a big part in holding me back, but I will write more about this soon.
I took a little break from things last week, from blogging and from Instagram, and I desperately needed to. I think it can be really useful to set yourself the task of creating content regularly, however I never want to feel like I am just saying stuff for the sake of it. Sometimes working to a schedule, squeezes great creative things out of you, but sometimes the pressure flattens all inspiration.
In reality, last week wasn’t the slow easy week I had hoped for. It turned into a pretty busy one, with the re-design, and was topped off with a heavy cold. It’s so hard to completely take a break when you are trying to make things happen on your own. Like with most things in the freelance blogging and writing world, I often feel like I have to think on my feet, and figure this stuff out as I go. I guess it’s the same with any new things in life – I find myself looking for some sort of guide book or map, and am always left feeling a little lost without either.
April saw our Instameet for Earth day which was lots of fun. A group of about 20 of us walked down to Cuckmere Haven together and noodled about on the beach. We chatted, ate some snacks and took a picture or two – it was a really relaxed affair, and I think everyone appreciated the chance to connect with other creative folk.
I spent a lovely morning ignoring all the things that needed to be done, took a walk, bought myself some flowers, and read my first issue of Wildling Magazine. It’s one of the best magazines I have read in a while. It’s full of beautiful photography and I just loved the writing.
I went to my first Movement Medicine class in Worthing during April. Moving my body has always been a way for me to find that deeper connection to myself, so it seemed like the perfect way to spend a Sunday morning – it felt so great to move – and not wanting to sound like a total hippie – but I really felt like I “worked through some stuff”.
I have also been ‘treating’ myself to a massage treatment semi-regularly. I did this before we fell pregnant with Bailey, and always attribute it to helping with her conception. It’s funny that we think of a massage to be a ‘treat’, whereas actually what we expect our bodies to do on a day-to-day basis, really makes it a necessity. It seems really ironic to me that by law (in England) you have to have an MOT check on your car once a year, but we don’t value our bodies enough to do the same. If you are in West Sussex I can thoroughly recommend a treatment with Clare.
I will just leave you with one thing to go and check out. Whilst I have been knuckling-down, sanding and painting the work space, I have been listening to podcasts back-to-back. I listened to the whole series of Magic Lesson by Elizabeth Gilbert over the course of two weekends. They are a great listen for anybody, but particularly if you do, or are thinking about doing something creative, I would say they were essential. Full of creative wisdom – you will never quite think of creativity the same way again.
Hope your month was good one.